Valentine’s Day Consolation for 2010

Once again the dreaded time of year approaches in that darkest, coldest, bleakest of cold months when those who haven’t found their other half are forced to stay indoors with their rented movies, cat and chocolate declarations that I don’t give a fuck what my body looks like and ponder the cruelty of the universe and what is so wrong with them that they can’t find anyone who wants them.

But there is one consolation this Valentine’s Day. While there will certainly be millions of couples remembering not to take for granted their significant others over romantic dinners, shared activities and hot passionate carnal acts, there will be little in the way of actual fun to be had on February 14th because it is a Sunday this year.

One can hardly imagine a more dreadful day to celebrate Valentine’s Day or anything else, for that matter. In my hometown half of the restaurants are closed by 6pm on Sundays and too bad if you are thinking of meandering around the mall, taking in a night of music and dance or browsing the downtown storefronts – those places are closed too. Sunday seems to carry with it an inherent gloom, heralding that last day of dignified freedom that always seems to go by too fast before the reality of the work week sets in. Do you think it’s a coincidence that 84% of suicides happen between the days of Sunday and Tuesday? Hell, by Thursday you already have the week licked and your temporary freedom is again within your grasp.

So to all you who must walk the blackened desert night all alone with the wind and sand remorselessly battering your face, take this one comfort: a Sunday Valentine’s Day is pretty sucky anyway.